Dropping through the air with nothing but a rope tied around your ankles, wind rushing past your face as you plummet, scared, and not knowing when it’s going to happen. Then all of a sudden your descent slows. You begin to feel sick, your stomach’s catching up with the momentum of your body. The ground is still getting closer. You fear that this could be the end. You close your eyes and brace for the impact. You feel the tug of the rope. Your momentum changes directions. Instead of or falling, you’re now being shot back up, but this is short-lived. Soon you start to twirl and twist back to the earth. You open your eyes, but after those few adrenaline-fueled seconds you realize you had forgotten how to breathe. Gasping for air, dangling below the bridge, wondering when your feet will be firmly planted on the ground. You anticipate your return to the bridge. Shouts of joy resonating off the sides of the deep crevasse into which you had leaped. You hear “good job!” and “way to go!” As you near the bottom of the structure, you reach out your hand but cannot say a word. A man with large muscles and a tie-dye shirt hoists you up and asks if you are ok. Your words slur in your response due to the immense amount of blood that had rushed into your head, but alas you are finished with this incredible feat. Joy overwhelms you as you realize what you have just accomplished. Friends and family smile and ask if you were scared. You reply with some arrogant and cocky comment like “not at all! It was actually quite calming.” But they don’t buy into what you’re saying due to your knees buckling and your face being red with excitement. For days you can’t help but discuss your twelve-second adventure with everyone you come in contact with. Who can blame you? Not many people jump off a bridge and live to tell the story. ~ Austin
That piece was written by my son, Austin, in his junior year of high school in 2010. I have to say I was quite impressed by his work. Not just because it was my kid but because I noticed I had been holding my breath as I read. I was captivated by the story.
So let me ask, what kind of story are you going to live to tell?
When you first get your diagnosis of chronic illness you spin for a while. The world seems to look completely different and you flounder. All your plans, hopes, and dreams shatter at your feet.
I know when you’re sick and your health seems to take so much of your time you feel guilty if you expend any kind of energy into something that isn’t work-related – either at your job or in your home. You can’t seem to justify taking a few moments to work on a craft when there are three million loads of laundry on the basement floor needing your attention. You may also have to drop out from extras that used to give your life a sense of purpose – like cooking at a soup kitchen or directing the children’s groups at your church.
Helping people is in my nature. I loved the career I held in the credit union industry because I was able to help people. But once I left the career to focus on my health I lost that feeling of accomplishment and sense of purpose I had in helping others. It seemed like all of a sudden life was focused just on me and my health.
So what now? What was I supposed to do with my life? When I can’t guarantee how my health is going to be on any given day, how am I to join any group or participate in anything that helps others.
Enter blogging.
I’m an introvert by nature. Ok, ok – I get plain reclusive at times. My blog started as just an outlet for creativity and a place where I could record the things I was learning about my new circumstance. I was struggling to find what my strength and new restrictions would allow and blogging fit within those limitations for me.
My prayer is that each of you will be able to find something you can embrace. Something that gives you a new sense of purpose and fulfillment, and offers moments of joy. Maybe you’d be great at running an online support network for others that are ill, maybe you could become a mentor, maybe you could create a line of greeting cards for those that are ill – the list is literally endless. People are constantly creating their own outlets these days and the internet allows us access to people and organizations that wouldn’t have hit our radar 20 years ago.
It may take some time to figure out a new passion and purpose as you struggle with the limitations your body has set for you. If you’re still searching for a diagnosis you might want to hold off until you feel like you have things settled into a new, workable normal. But don’t give up!
I hope you aspire to add a few more chapters to your story. Tales of excitement, adventure, and challenge that leave your adrenaline pumping. Sure, it’s probably not going to look like a bungee jump off a bridge but it will create moments that become the stories that leave you knowing you have a purpose and make you feel like you’re alive!
