The holiday season is supposed to be the most joyful time of the year. It’s the time we celebrate the birth of Christ! We surround ourselves with family gatherings and celebrations and watch traditions lived out through new generations. But holidays when you’re chronically ill feel much, much different. It’s hard to be thankful when life isn’t the way you wanted it to be.
Instead of: Joy – Celebration – Merriment
It feels like: Loneliness – Juggling – Overwhelm – Stress – Guilt – Anxiety – Jealousy
Over the years I’ve learned a few things about going through the holidays with chronic illness and I’d like to share them with you.
Here are 18 tips to get you through the holidays when you’re chronically ill:
1. Soak in the advent. Take time each day to focus on the birth of Christ and the reason we celebrate this season. Find a quiet moment to read the first two chapters of both Matthew and Luke. Pay attention as if you’ve never read it before. Pray that God would help you see it in a fresh way this year. You should also read this post by Margaret Feinberg -How to hold the hurting extra, extra close this Christmas.
2. It’s a good idea to make a plan. It keeps you focused on the amount of work that needs to be done so you don’t procrastinate on days when you do have the ability to check something off your list.
3. The plan has to include plenty of time. Even more time than you think you need – keep in mind there will be days when you won’t physically be able to do anything at all.
4. Keep your focus where it should be. Don’t get so caught up in the gifts and decor that you forget to focus on the birth of the Savior. Enjoy your family. In five years, your family won’t remember the meal. Odds are they won’t be able to recall most of the gifts they received. But they will remember holidays spent playing games, watching movies, and just simply being together.
5. Give yourself grace. Remember a plan is a plan – not a mandate. You can’t account for an extended flare or added things that drain your health and cause you to trash a few things from your to-do list. Be flexible and adjust your plan as you go.
6. You need to remember, all these “things” are meant to enhance the season, to bring our focus to the celebration of Christ’s birth, and to allow us time to focus on those we love. So when those gatherings, shopping, cooking, and card-sending take away from this it’s time to step back and re-evaluate. These events should be a blessing, not a burden.
7. If a certain gathering is going to leave you overwhelmed, exhausted, and frustrated it might be time to reconsider attending. Maybe it’s time for a change. Does the event, gathering, or gift exchange support your values and goals for the holiday?
8. Make a list of websites you like to visit for the best deals. Be sure to check back often – daily, if you can! Don’t stress over the “perfect” gift – remember the whole point is to show love.
9. If possible, don’t host! That way you don’t have to worry about cooking and cleaning and taking the gamble that your health will be up to the challenge. Consider going to someone else’s home and take a crockpot dish or a treat to share.
10. If you’re having dinner at your home, make a list of what you need. Do you need to borrow extra chairs or a folding table? Is there anything else you can think of that you’ll need if it’s hosted at your home? Decide on the menu. Don’t hesitate to ask others to help by bringing a dish or two to share. If someone volunteers to come to help you clean, take them up on the offer!
11. Pick up some paper plates for everyday use and some decorative ones. (Yes, I’m suggesting paper plates for the holidays.) I do believe in taking care of our environment but there are times that our health demands certain things, like less clean up during this busy time of the year. Pick up aluminum pans in the sizes you need for the dishes you’re making. If you’re taking a dish to someone’s house these pans are perfect – if you need to leave early due to your health, you won’t have to worry about retrieving your best casserole bowl at a later time. If you are making bread or another treat to give as gifts – these pans can be wrapped in a colored plastic wrap and tied with a bow. Even if you’re cooking at home, these can be tossed and cleanup is a breeze. Your local dollar store should have a large selection of these pans in various sizes
12. Wrap as you buy. You should be in full shopping mode now, so wrap each gift as you purchase it or receive it in the mail. There’s nothing worse than finding yourself on Christmas Eve with no energy, no spoons left but a huge pile of gifts that still need to be wrapped. Talk about stealing the holiday joy.
13. Fill your home with holiday scents. Don’t skimp on some of the little things that can make a huge difference. Use those candles, wax melts, or essential oils to fill your home with the aromas of the season.
14. Look up and pick out a few crockpot, Instant Pot, or freezer meals. Just scroll through Pinterest or try this site I love six sisters stuff and look for a few super quick recipes your family will enjoy.
15. Find your favorite Christmas movie and watch it. Enjoy some holiday music.
16. Complete one craft project at a time. If you have five started but never get any finished you haven’t done yourself a favor. Instead of saving money by making a gift, you’ll be scrambling last minute, stressed out, spending more than you planned, and wearing out your body. Focus on finishing one at a time and stick with it until it’s done. When it’s done and wrapped, start the next one!
17. Moderation is key. Decide what is your family’s favorite holiday treat or tradition and focus on just making sure that gets done. Remember having one decoration out, and enjoying it, is better than completely draining your body in order to have your home all decked out to the max. That goes for the holiday goodies too – having one favorite you can sit and enjoy with friends or family is better than busting your buns to have a plethora of treats but ending up in bed for a week because you’ve thrown yourself into a flare!
18. Deck the halls. Well, maybe not the halls but at least get some Christmas decor up to set the mood for the holidays. Don’t put pressure on yourself to set out every piece of holiday decor you own – use just your favorite pieces. The less-is-more mentality will keep your home less cluttered but allow you to enjoy the best and most meaningful items you own. By all means, don’t try to turn your home into a winter wonderland in one day. When you have a moment of energy, take down one of your fall pieces and replace it with your holiday items.
